We all make bad decisions in life. Making mistakes is part of being human. The same is true when it comes to relationships. Sometimes people make mistakes that might make differences irreconcilable.
Although most of the time, bad relationships cannot be saved, we can’t help but do the most human thing anyone can do – which is, to try to save a relationship for the sake of our own happiness.
Here are eight of the easy steps you should take if you still wish to make a new start in your relationship. Keep it slowly but surely!
Take some time apart
Do not contact her for at least two weeks. Allow some time to help her calm down, take some breather to put things in logical perspective. A little time apart will help both of you to look back on events of the relationship, the feelings, and visions. Apart, both of you can evaluate every single event leading to the break-up. Don’t worry, break-ups are always emotionally-draining but things will become better after some time. After putting things in perspective, you are now ready to either get back together or just move on.
Focus on what you want
Take time to pick your own self up if your relationship fails. Make use of the time away as a chance to build a new you. Enjoy your life as a singleton. Enjoy being free of compromise and have an honest evaluation of who you are and what you want. By this time, you can start building yourself up. It will be a new you who will face life, either with your former lover or with someone else. Be certain that you are ready to have her back 100% of the time, not everyone gets a second chance at a relationship.
Understand why she left you
Remember that she has her own life, which means, she is entitled to her own decisions. If you don’t know where you went wrong, take time to reflect. There may be something you failed to do that forced her to dump you. Recall what happened before the breakup. Recall what she had been saying and the possible signs leading to the break-up. Once you realize where, who and why you went wrong, you’ll begin to understand why the relationship had to end.
Reach out and contact her
Now ask yourself, do you still want her back? If yes, it’s time to reach out to her again.
Always remember to keep your message light and playful. Show her the soft side of you, the person she knew when you first dated (only better)! Do not start with the message “we have to talk” or “I want to get back together.” These lines will do little to nothing if you want to get back with her.
Get together and keep it casual
The first time you meet after the break-up is something very important. Regardless of the time gap from the day you broke up, it is very important to keep your cool. Show her the guy she fell in love with and not the guy she broke up with. Keep things casual like you are meeting an old friend. Do not appear to be too needy to impress her. Keep the conversation away from showing that you are sexually interested in her. Keep it light and fun.
Keep having casual meet-ups
Do you still want her back after your first meet-up? If yes, keep the casual meet-ups going. It is very important to keep checking yourself if you still want her back. Do not be too wrapped up in the process of getting her back, instead, focus on the reasons why you still want her.
Go for it
After a handful of successful dates, you have a better chance of finally getting her back. Now is the time for you to go for it. Tell her what you’ve realized after the break-up. Tell her what you plan to achieve in your relationship.
Do the work
Now is the time to start working on those things you realized while you were apart. Show her that you have become a new man by changing your old ways. Communicate better and be more patient. Do your best to make the new relationship last.